GBH of the Ear'ole
by sfordcar
Summary: Minder: Arthur Daley sees a Nice Little Earner when he makes his Minder Terry McCann a singer!
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own Minder and did not write the song "Quids and Quavers"

GBH of the Ear'ole

What happened after "Quids and Quavers"? Here it is revealed as Arthur gets Terry a job as a singer.

* * *

"'Ello Marge," Terry said, "Why the siren?"

"Oh that was another police car, my Cortina is outside." Margery replied, "Who was that walking out your flat? looks familiar."

"Arthur…Arthur Daley," Terry replied reluctantly.

"Sounds familiar too, my mum bought a TV of him from some man selling them from door to door, I think she needs a hearing aid now."

"'Earing aid?"

"Yes, well apparently the sound waves are not built for humans, so how do you know him."

"I 'er do a bit of work for 'im."

"Work for Arthur Daley, dodgiest dealer in London!"

"Yeah, well 'e gives me a bit of cash from time to time, lets go out for a drink!" Terry said trying to drop the subject.

Arthur got out of his Jag and walked into a club.

"Hello Arthur, aint seen you round here for a while," The manager said.

"Hi Olly, look a boy of mine 'as got singing talent! E'll be on Top of The Pops in no time!" Arthur said.

"So?"

"Well lets get a few performances rolling down 'ere, there'll be a nice littler earner in it for both of us!"

"I want a big earner Arthur!"

"Yeah cause Olly! Lets say you give me a ton for putting 'im on!"

"Me pay you? Look that'll be happening when he's a big hit."

"Look lets say e'll turn out massive, people will want to stay in the club and get more drinks, meaning more earnings for you!"

"Alright Arthur, I'll give you 50, for one night and I'll see what he's like."

"70!"

"60!"

"Deal," Arthur said excitedly, "when is 'e on then!"

"Tomorrow night! The band in has to clear out early and then your boy can come on!"

"Tomorrow?"

"Tomorrow or no deal Arthur!"

"Alright, alright, show us the readies then!"

Olly pulled out a load of cash from his pocket. "30 now 30 after."

"Alright," Arthur said already taking the money.

"Always out for a earner aren't you Arthur, you'd even make your Minder Terry sing wouldn't you!"

* * *

Thanks for reading and please review! So does Arthur get a few more earners or does it all go wrong? Keep reading to find out! 


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I do not own Minder and did not write the song "Quids and Quavers"

Chapter 2

* * *

Arthur was sitting at the bar at the Winchester chatting to Dave. 

"I'm telling you Dave, Terry could be a big 'it!"

"Yeah but you haven't told him that he's on tomorrow!"

Terry walked down the stairs and sat next to Arthur.

"Usual please Dave," Terry said.

"Look Terence, you know Olly's club," Arthur said.

"Look I'm not being a bouncer down that place again!" Terry demanded.

"No, no nothing like that my son, you know earlier you were singing about that…"

"Police woman," Terry continued.

"Please Terry don't say that, well Olly down 'is club says 'e will put you on for 30 quid tomorrow night and I'm willing to split that right down the middle."

"Look Arthur I 'ope your joking!"

"No all you got to do is just sing that song and were in for 15 quid each!"

"It's not enough money though!" Terry shouted getting annoyed at Arthur.

"Yes, but it's just a trial to see what your like, you better get practice then!"

"One song?"

"One song Terry and I'll buy you a drink straight after."

"Alright, alright but I want 20 sovs!"

"Alright, 20."

Dave came back down to their end of the bar, "Arthur, you know that TV I bought off you, ever since I've been watching it I've been getting ringing in the ears!"

"Well what do you expect for that price, it was a steal Dave!" Arthur said.

"Yeah, I know who stole it!" Dave said.

* * *

Thanks for reading and please review. 


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I do not own Minder and did not write the song "Quids and Quavers"

Chapter 3

* * *

Terry was at his flat when Arthur started knocking at the door, "Terry! Terry let me in!" 

Terry opened the door, "What do you want Arthur?"

"I want you to deliver two of those TV's for me?"

"Where?"

"Clinic near by the lock-up."

"Clinic, the patients won't ever leave with those TV's in there!" Terry laughed.

"There is nothing wrong with the sound on those TV's just a coincidence that everyone 'as ear ache."

"Alight 'ow much am I gonna get out of this?"

"Ten quid from the profit."

"I'll get going now then."

Terry and Arthur left the flat with Arthur going to the Winchester Club and Terry getting into his Capri.

Terry arrived at the clinic and went to the desk.

"Are you expecting two TV's from Arthur Daley?" Terry asked.

"Yes," the receptionist said "Could you please put one on the table over there and leave one here, I have the money for you."

Terry went to the boot of his Capri pulled out one and put it on the table in a waiting area, he went and got the other one and left it with the receptionist as she handed him the money, "Thank you," Terry said as he looked over to a patient putting a Fulham game on the TV, "Mind if I watch the game here?" Terry asked, "The TV Arthur gave me is on the blink again."

* * *

Thanks for reading and please review. 


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: I do not own Minder and did not write the song "Quids and Quavers"

Chapter 4

* * *

Early in the morning Arthur woke Terry up knocking at the door.

"Terry, all set for the big day?" Arthur asked.

"Yeah…" He coughed, his throat was very soar and he could not speak properly, "My voi…ce."

"Something wrong Terrence?" Arthur asked.

"The Clinic…yesterday!"

"Got a bit of a cold 'ave we Terry?"

"Its your fault Ar'fur! I got to sing…tonight"

"Oh my good gawd!" Arthur said, "were not gonna get our dough are we!"

"All you can think about is the money!" He said coughing, "You…"

"Now Terry," he interrupted, "a couple of cough sweets and you'll be fine! 'ere I got some in the lock up you can 'ave!"

"Arthur, I need ones that work! Not a bunch from Medicine Michael!"

"'Es got an 'onest name Terry, it even 'as medical in it!"

"'E provides pain killers for a broken leg!"

"Look Terry, you just get well, I'll be back soon with those cough sweets!" Arthur ran out the door as soon as he saw Marge through the window.

She walked into the flat, "Hello Terry!"

"'Ell…o!" Terry said.

"What's wrong with your voice?" Marge asked.

"Arthur! And I got to sing tonight!"

* * *

Thanks for reading and please review! So do Arthur and Terry get their wedge? Keep reading to find out! 


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: I do not own Minder and did not write the song "Quids and Quavers"

Chapter 5

* * *

Arthur pulled in his Jaguar outside Olly's club and walked in to see Olly getting everything ready for the night.

"Watcha Arthur!" Olly said

"About my boy Olly…"

"Everything ready is it?"

"Uh…we've got a bit of Barny Rubble Olly."

"What?"

"He sounds awful and 'is boat is in a terrible shape!"

"Sounds awful?"

"Well, 'e seems to 'av a bit of a cold so is there any chance we can delay his performance?"

"Let me introduce you to my lads," two big men walked up by him.

"'ello…lads," Arthur said nervously.

"You see, we got no one else to entertain the punters tonight, and if your boy don't sing, my boys might get angry, understood?"

"Uh, well I'm sure my boy will do the best 'e can."

"Good Arthur, very good."

* * *

Thanks for reading.


	6. Chapter 6

Disclaimer: I do not own Minder and did not write the song "Quids and Quavers"

Chapter 6

* * *

Arthur and Terry were at the bar at the Winchester chatting to Dave as usual.

"Look Terry, think of the money," Arthur said.

"What kind of mug do you take me for? Its not real money is it!" Terry said in a rough voice.

"You mean its counterfeit?" Dave laughed.

"Oh very funny Dave." Terry replied.

"Yeah but Terry, 'e's got these lads and 'e's gonna smash our faces in if you don't sing!" Arthur said cowardly.

"Alright, alright…I'll sing one song."

"Good boy Terry! Dave will be there won't you Dave?"

"Sure thing Tel, don't want to miss your big moment do I!" Dave chuckled at another of Arthur and Terry's business schemes.

* * *

Thanks for reading and please review.


	7. Chapter 7

Disclaimer: I do not own Minder and did not write the song "Quids and Quavers"

Chapter 7

* * *

Arthur and Terry both got out of Arthur's Jaguar and made their way towards the entrance of the club, on entering Olly was waiting.

"I thought you two would never turn up," Olly said.

"Would we turn this establishment down?" Arthur said, "Well Terry get up on stage."

"Uh…yeah," Terry mumbled.

"What the hells wrong with his voice?" Olly asked Arthur.

"'E's just relaxing it to make sure its ready for the performance," Arthur replied.

"Well get up on stage then!" Olly shouted pointing towards the stage.

Terry slowly made his way towards the stage, in no condition to fight Olly's bouncers, or to sing.

Dave walked into the club after his relief had arrived at the Winchester.

"This is a…" Terry mumbled coughing, "…song called Margery."

"Oh my gawd," Arthur said leaning over the bar, "Large VAT please."

Terry began to sing in a slow, groggy tone "When the moon is blue…"

Dave made his way towards Arthur, "No Bob Dylan is he?"

Arthur replied, "no, I think I just better see a man about a dog."

"You stay were you are Daley!" Olly shouted, "Shut it Terry!"

"Look, we don't want any trouble we'll just go," Terry said to Olly making his way down from the stage.

"Then give me my money back Arthur!"

"All of it?" Arthur asked wanting to still make a small profit.

"Yes, the 30 quid I gave you before the performance"

"And let me guess, another 30 after," Terry said thinking about the 20 pounds in it for him, "Thanks a lot Arthur."

Arthur reluctantly pulled the money out of his wallet and handed it to Olly, "I want you two gents to leave now please!"

Arthur, Terry and Dave left the club, "Arthur, you can forget all that manager rubbish you were talking about, from now on my musical career is over." Terry complained.

"But Terrence, a first gig is bound to go a little wrong, I've got a mate, who's got a mate who's getting married and needs some entertain…" Arthur stopped as Terry walked very quickly in the opposite direction, "Terry! Terrence!"

* * *

Thank you for reading!


End file.
